Thursday, August 16, 2007

Not Yet Home....

It’s midnight. I find myself walking in circles in the terrace.
Under the serene starry night, I can hear the rustling of the leaves of the coconut tree, the distant beckoning sound of a train, the screeching of an R1 bike as it comes to a halt…

Yes, they are sights and sounds of a city life.

As soothing as the night sky and the cool breeze is, my mind refuses to breathe easy. It is wandering arbitrarily, with no sense of purpose, no direction.

The far off running train is seductively enticing me to that place call home. Somewhere in my sub conscience, I can hear the soft tunes of a celebrated song call ‘Home’ … resonating.

‘I'm going home,Back to the place where I belong,And where your love has always been enough for me.I'm not running from.No, I think you got me all wrong.I don't regret this life chose for me.But these places and these faces are getting oldSo I'm going home.Well I'm going home…’

Home!

The tiny word brings up such tenderness in ones heart, its as if one was touched and deeply moved.

But Why?

When we speak of home, we often understood it as a place, an abode where our family resides. It brings up a feeling of being connected or something you identify with.

Its absolutely right.

However, is that it? Are family ties, unconditional love, acceptance all that is to Home?

I would like to think not.
I would rather have a far more definitive, complete, concluding, conclusive, nailed down understanding of Home.

I know I am home, when I have arrived.

Right now, am still a wayfarer who most often than not, hitch hike on rides, rub shoulders with fellow travellers, at times uplifted-at times crestfallen by their stories, touched by the ordinary, awed by the miracles, learning, observing, discovering, inspired, heart-broken, and still far from having arrived.

I have not taken the first step towards Home yet.

I am yet to discover myself.

26 years, educational qualifications, a pretty job, an equally good life does not mean I know anything about myself.
Yes, its pretty scary.
No wonder am circling this terrace!

But hey, I do know one thing though… I am curious to learn. And, that will suffice for now.

I got a long way to go. One day, I’ll stop walking in circles.
I’ll be Home.
Amen to that.

6 comments:

  1. Good One. Your blogs are becoming more steady, with more grounding in the way you write. Fantastic :)

    Ashish

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  2. dear home is where ur heart is...it can be ur love ones, ur family, the work u love....guess when all these collide n contentment seeps in one can say "yes i have arrive in a complete home at last"....love it babe...n to write like this u need to experience life (with loads of people;))

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  3. i dont agree with ashish ... ur just as lost as u always were ... thats good though ... confusion is good ... there's only one way to go from confusion ... it always leads to clarity ... u can take comfort in the fact that ur senses are still working ... amen to that too.

    ReplyDelete
  4. khujcho haath barie
    nijer prithibi
    ondhokare alor disha
    sunyo mone prem
    icche kichu koyed mone
    kichu lagam chara
    haoar sure gondho jamon
    matal gaane veja
    bhalolagar ei neshate
    harie thako tumi

    bhalo tomay bashbo sokhi
    brishti vejar moto
    joler tore jakna dhue
    chokher joler kona gulo
    harak hisheb bhule
    bhalo laaga thakna emni
    hridoy khani jure

    ReplyDelete
  5. "Home" Its pretty strong word for me. For many its just another word, another construction made of bricks and cement and for some its where you return after your journey ends.
    Some one told me Life is a journey live it as it comes. Does that mean My home would come only when my journey or should i say Life ends? my home is the very earth where i was brought from? I dont know. because iam still travelling.

    Yes in my terms my home is in the arms of love. And one true love we all find is in our parents arms. No matter what they would always love you.And for them the home is where the children respect them and love them. where there is peace of mind.

    I come back from day's work and when i enter my home i feel releived, its a coccoon i live in. gives me feeling of warmth n love.

    I have not yet explored the ways of travellers, would love to some day, and see the actual journey of love and learn its lessons.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Corretja!!!
    love ur rambling sapling!!!

    ReplyDelete

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